I've really been into Secret recently..their song 3년 6개월 is so good :D always liked Song Jieun from her featuring in Untouchable's 다줄께 and now i like her even more, beautiful voice, and she's really pretty too~

I can't forget the time we spent together, the long three and a half years.
It's been really hard. I waited for a long time.
I'll let myself go from the painful times, my love

Labels: music

Disgusted. I am actually disgusted with myself.
Eurgh. Need to sort this out.

I really never thought it sounded that bad until i read over it all just now.
The impression people must have of me from knowing this. Disgusting.

Labels: thoughts

IRIS<3 i wasnt actually planning to watch it any time soon, but then i kept reading about it, and the ratings were high, so i started watching it last night. Watched episodes 1-3 in bed on my ipod, finished at 2.45am but damn, the drama is so good! Some parts of it are so tense, and then some are quite funny, and some so sweet and cute~ loving the characters already~ TOP<3 omg, he's so sexy speaking english. His accent and deep voice 'yeah, i'm on my way' -dies~~- omg<3 haha.

Downloaded up to episode 10 so far, converted a few more episodes to watch tonight, even though i should revise..tomorrow i'm gonna watch You're Beautiful, since episode 15 and 16 would've been subbed, and its the ending~~~ damn, i really want an extension...

Oh. And, the IRIS ost<3 mainly into Baek Jiyoung's Don't Forget, and Big Bang's Hallelujah~ really like these songs, and it's an extra that i love both artists.

I didn't blog before about my mocks..so here:

English Literature: Eurgh, i hate lit. I really do...anthology is bad, but i can withstand it. To kill a mockingbird...bad.bad.bad. I just have no interest in the book, i wrote about 2 sides for that section, so i guess i wrote a decent amount, seeing that my handwriting is quite small aswell...i wrote 2 sides for the antho aswell...but i finished early? can't be right, i probably didn't do too well since finishing early on a lit. exam isn't something that i should be doing.

Maths Calculator: Better than the noncalc, some parts of it just made no sense to me though, i looked at this one question for like 10mins trying to work it out, then realised it was only 1 mark so i left it, still didn't work it out at the end though...found out that 79 is needed to get an A*..lets just hope i don't get anything under 60.

Geography: I didn't think this exam was that bad, some people thought it was hard though, so maybe i just didn't do too well...map question was stupid, the grid reference lead to a space of nothingness. Oh, but my teacher said i got either an A or B in my DME geography exam~

German Listening: Fail. Nothing else. Just fail. I probably guessed most of the answers, so did most of everyone else that took the exam though, even the teacher said it was hard. Hopefully i'll improve for the real GCSEs.

Business Studies tomorrow, 2hour paper..and i need to revise..reading on the bus (Y) need to look over the case study aswell, luckily i have 2 study periods before the exam.

Labels: drama, exam, mocks, music, school

사랑을 믿었어 너 때문에 너 때문에
답 답 답해~
너 때문에 많이 사랑을 믿었어

Damn, i am in love with this song. After School's second single, it's so catchy, and shows really good vocals. Can't wait for the release of the full album, mv and the perfs...mv will be released on friday, along with the music bank perf, then there's the music core perf, and inkigayo perf~ Jooyeon looks really nice in the concept photos aswell, and so do the two new members~

Yesterday night, i started talking to Linda on msn again, was good to talk to her since i haven't in like 6 months. Caught up a bit, and was talking about school and how my mum used to be really strict, but is a bit less now..haha.

German Reading: Started off okay, got a bit harder but i could kind of make out what the question was asking and what the answer was, then it got to the last 2 questions were complete fail. The last question i just couldn't do at all, made no sense to me, it was a sign on the back of a lorry? and the only words i understood from it was 'fast' which is almost and 'ihr' which is their. Not helpful. The second to last question..i could answer some of it, but one part..i knew what the answer was, i found it in the text but i couldn't translate it..and we had to answer in english..but i found it..so i just put it in german and left it. Ha.

English Paper 2: Antho, bad..ish. I wrote about 2 pages, but i think i repeated myself a bit, and didn't put in enough quotes and stuff...but i did have a few points...they can't expect much though, we didn't exactly learn much in those poems. The describe question was better, i wrote 2 pages, like you're meant to. I think i described quite well, but i'm not sure about the movement of the writing..the question was 'Describe a journey on a plane, train, bus or car' i wrote it with a car, and started off with the zoom out technique, and described senses and stuff..but the 'journey' was simply from a quiet road, to a city street, back to a quiet road. Don't know what the examiner will think of that...hope it was okay though.

Labels: exam, friends, mocks, music, school

Hot, ikr? Joon is so sexy~ and Mir looks adorable trying to cover himself up haha.
Aigoo Joon~ heal up soon! Then you can perform and dance properly again~
Fighting!<3

Labels: music

MAMA<3 Managed to watch the ending live~ got to see the winners of the artist, song and album of the year<3 really happy with the results.

Album of the year: G-Dragon (Heartbreaker)
Song of the year: 2NE1 - I Don't Care
Artist of the year: 2PM

2NE1 also won best MV for fire and the best new female artist and 2PM won the best boy band, in 2PM's speeches they mentioned Jay<3 and they performed again&again, and left the space where Jay should be, sadly they didn't put his overvoice with it..they just left it silent and did the dance for Jay's part.

2PM won 'Artist of the Year' and they stated:
"We are very happy that we received this award. Even though our leader, Park Jaebeom, isn't here, we would like to share this honor with him. We can't believe this. We are very thankful for the fans who will always be with us. There were a lot of things that happened. We give honor to those fans who have stayed and helped us."
credits: allkpop.com

2NE1 did their musical 21st street, was really good :D they performed I don't care together, then Dara performed Kiss, Parkbom performed You and I, and CL and Minzy performed their single released yesterday, Please Don't Go. Really good performance, when Minzy sang her part i almost thought Parkbom came out for a while..such a good voice.

GDYB performed Korean Dream<3 was good seeing the two on stage together, Jiyong performed Heartbreaker before that, and then Youngbae performed Where you at? and Wedding Dress<3

YGfamily owned the MAMA this year :D and 2PM was definitely a great part of it aswell..just annoyed that neither MBLAQ or BEAST won the best new male artist award it's stupid, i wanted to see MBLAQ win it T_T

Labels: music

leehongki just with a few words he made me cry in You're Beautiful. His acting is so good, and he's so sweet, damn. I think i'm gonna go and rewatch that part, just because..it was that good.

Started spazzing within the first 3minutes of episode 13, so sweet how Taekyung is<3 janggeunsuk & parkshinhye <3 they should be together in real, have such good chemistry~
You're Beautiful is at such a tense part, Shinwoo is trying to get Minyu to like him, Jeremy has to hide his feelings and face the fact that Minyu likes Taekyung. Taekyung likes Minyu back but his mum goes and completely ruins it between them with the story about her and Minyu's dad. Aigoo.

Need to wait until next thursday for the subbed ep15, i really hope that it gets extended, or else it ends next week..i want it to last for longer. And i want A.N.JELL to be at MAMA, and perform 여전히 and 약속, and JGS & PSH to do a duet of 말도 없이 <3

Jeremy, Taenyu, Shinwoo<3

Labels: drama, love

English Paper 1: Wasn't that bad, hand started to hurt in the exam but i wrote about 4 sides for section A, then 1 and a third sides for section B..

Geography (DME): Was okay, would've done better with more time though..had to rush quite a bit at the end..and i should've read through my notes on the resource booklet in the morning..

ICT: Easiest exam out so far, finished half an hour early, so i was singing wedding dress in my head haha~ i remembered most of the words! The exam was pretty easy, i understood almost everything, some things were guessed, but then some of the answers were quite obvious. Got to finish school 20mins early aswell, since the exam was over and we don't have lessons~

Labels: exam, mocks, school

Religious Studies: The exam was alright, i finished a bit early, then sat there spinning my pen haha. I wrote some stuff that actually made sense and that i'm pretty sure was right and accurate, and some of the stuff i wrote was just complete bullshit. Like for the 'Explain two ways how people show they are spiritual' I really couldn't think of anything to write, when it said spiritual, i was thinking more of ghosts and spirits and stuff, and i was constantly thinking 'Answer: to die and then come back alive' but obviously that wasn't going to be the answer so i just wrote 'Their way of living + (what they do?)' I can't remember if that's what i wrote for the second one, but yeah, most likely wrong. And there was a free will question that i couldn't answer properly without constantly repeating myself because i forgot to revise that chapter.

Maths (Non-calculator): Atleast, i wasn't the only person who thought this was hard. I actually can't do non-calculator, calculator tests are so much easier. I missed quite a few questions in this exam, and also stared and tried to work out a question for 10mins, then realised it was only 1 mark so i skipped it, i still don't even know how to work it out. Bisector question, they could've told us they were going to bring in stuff from year9! I couldn't remember any constructing stuff...i really didn't think it was going to come up. And then there was the whole 'in terms of _' questions, one of them i just couldn't work out, it made no sense to me because i didn't think there were enough values to be able to work it out, and then another..i think i tried to think too deep into it, since it was actually an easy 2 marks, but i just couldn't work it out. I think i did the last question right though, was just about graphs..and in the question it said f(x) so being me, i started singing Chu~♡ in my head for a while haha. Luckily i understood the question and got it done easily, so the song didn't really distract me too much.

Was in period 3+4 with Joyce, doing maths revision. Printed out a past paper last night, only got through half of it then pretty much gave up. Now i need to revise ict, 55 pages of information to absorb before 1.45pm and i need to look over my geography DME notes aswell..aish. It will be good once these mocks are over. Really hope i can get good grades in these though.
Added a cbox, comment anyone? :D

Labels: exam, mocks, school

Revision. Revision. Revision.
Must revise until December 1st, then mocks will be over and i can relax..aish.

Labels: mocks, school

After starting their activities as a 6 membered group, it has been revealed that 2PM’s leader Park Jaebum also participated in their comeback through an international phone call. Before they prepared to get on stage on KBS Music Bank, 2PM gave a phone call to Park Jaebum in Seattle and gave a promise to show their best stage along with their famous greeting.

Group singers usually have their own greeting and words of encouragement before a stage. For 2PM, it began with the leader’s “What time is it now?” followed by the rest of the members’ “It’s 2PM!” greeting.

But the leader was not present for the day of their comeback. Through Wooyoung’s cell phone, 2PM was able to call Jaebum in America and conversed through the speaker phone.

Through the phone, Jaebum shouted “What time is it now?” and 2PM shouted back “2PM.” The staff and other singers watching them in the waiting room gave a round of applause at the scene. A representative of JYPE stated “It was a very tearful scene for everyone in the room. 2PM must go on leaving the empty space for their leader and have even withdrawn from variety shows.”

C: DONGA NEWS; hazyfiasco@2ONEDAY; kbites

So sweet, there's still 2PM love. Just need Jay to be back in person, then they can start properly, no need for the phone. Listen to my heartbeat.

Labels: music

Mocks Timetable

191109
8.50am Religious Studies
1.45pm Maths (Non-calculator)

201109
8.50am English (Paper 1)
11.10am Geography (DME)
1.45pm ICT

231109
8.50am German Reading
1.45pm English (Paper 2)

241109
8.50am English Literature
1.45pm Maths (Calculator)

251109
11.10am Geography

261109
11.10am German Listening

271109
11.10pm Business Studies

011209
2.40pm German Speaking

Labels: exam, mocks, school

leejoon<3

Labels: love, music

Wow, i must have been pretty out of it if i didn't blog with my mass of thoughts about the 1.59pm album o__o..listen to my HEARTbeat~ damn i love the whole album, all the new songs, the old songs, the remixes, the intro, everything.

6 out of the 13 songs has jays voice in it right? and he's the 7th missing member..maybe the 7th song that comes out with his voice in..will be his comeback? ♥ and most of the songs in 1.59pm are about leaving, or coming back, or waiting...and all of the new songs except tired of waiting has some english in it..reaching out to our seattle boy jay? ♥

They left him in the fanchant<3 thank you hottest!

park jaebeom, kim junsu
nichkhun, ok taecyeon
jang wooyoung, lee junho
hwang chansung, 2PM♥

The music bank perf was really good, loved the intro dance, and it's all performed nicely...just it all somehow reminds me of Jay, even if he isn't there..

Was on soompi during ict today, read an article about JYP and Jay, it said about how if Jay wants to come back, then JYP will help him willingly, and that he's going to give him singing and dancing lessons to keep his standards up. And the part i like the most, If Jay makes a comeback, it won't be a solo. Of course, it would be with 2PM. JYP, Jay and the rest of the 2pm members wouldn't want Jay to come back solo. <3

Jay will be back, he'll be back soon with 2pm. He has to, he's keeping the 5 year contract. It just depends when he'll be coming back...just, hopefully, it'll be soon.

Baby, please don’t take his hand
Coz you should be my lady
I’ve been waiting for you for so long
Please look at me now

The wedding dress you’re wearing~
Dong youngbae released his title track wedding dress today, i swear everyone's listening to it, i see it on their pms, sn and status' haha. YG said that wedding dress was going to be promoted strongly for the rest of the year, can't wait to see the comeback perf, love the choreography for it.

The music video omg, so sad. The part where Youngbae takes the girl away from her friend, and is about to propose, but then his friend comes along and sticks the ring on her finger before Youngbae could get his ring out of his pocket T_T

말도없이 눌물이 흘러내려
말도없이 가슴이 무너져가

You're Beautiful<3 I am actually in love with this drama. Lee Hongki, Jang Geunsuk, Jung Yonghwa, Park Shinhye. Perfect cast, i love it<3 Yonghwa is so sweet, he's like, the perfect sweet heart, that has the bad end of liking the girl who doesn't like him back. Geunsuk, the mean guy, but nonetheless he's so sweet aswell. And Hongki, just as always, silly and adorably cute, i swear i squeal whilst watching him, just too adorkable.

And the song, 말도없이, without words..i can read all the lyrics in korean hangeul characters! :D haha, i can actually read it fast enough to sing it without romanising it~ keke, love the song. hajimal geol geuraesseo~ moreun cheokhae beorilgeol~


2PM - Intro + Heartbeat @ Music Bank


Taeyang - Wedding Dress


Park Shinhye - Without Words


omg, i was looking through vids and found this, it's so cute!! omg. Jang Geunsuk & Park Shinhye<3 so cute together~

Labels: drama, music, thoughts

너를 기다리다 지쳐 미치고
또 하루하루 매일같이 일년이 같고
오~난 나 나 나~ 기다리다가 널 기다리다가 yeah~
금방이라도 니가 다시 올 것만 같고
뒤돌아서면 다시 너를 볼 것만 같아
오~난 나 나 나~ 지쳐 미치고 난 지쳐 미치고 yeah~

I'm actually sitting here listening to the song trying to work out the difference between Jay's voice mixed in with Junsu's autotune, and Junsu's autotune. And i think i've found it.

If you listen to 1.00 of the song, and 1.15, both are autotuned, but 1.00 is Jay and Junsu, mainly overlap with Jay. and 1.15 is purely Junsu. if you compare them both, even if theyre different tones, the autotune voice is different, but they're both autotune. it's definitely Jay, it just depends if it was recorded before he left, and they just didn't want to change it. or if he's really back...

They tried to fake it as Junsu's autotune..but if Junsu's voice was autotuned it would NOT sound like that. it's not possible for Junsu's voice to sound like that. And even the adlib at the end..it's in Jay's voice style, like how you would hear him do adlibs for only you and again & again. it's got to be Jay.

Even at the beginning, the 'oooh~' that can't be Junsu, it's not his voice. I can tell Jay's voice because it's so distinctive..it must've either been pre-recorded before he left, or it was recent, and Jay's back with 2PM...
It has to be directed at Jay right? They're waiting for him, just like everyone else is.

I am going insane, going insane, I am holding back just in case you come back,
I am still waiting.
Even if a month goes by, I'll still remember you, even if a year goes by, I still won't let you go.
Can you understand my desires for you? Going insane while waiting and each day feels like a year.
I was waiting and while I was waiting, it felt as if you would come back,
or if I look back I would see your face. I am going insane, going insane

7-1=0

Labels: music, thoughts

It's not that I refuse to love, but that I haven't found the reason to love. I've been told, a few too many times to simply step back into real life. It's more on the lines of 'Zoe, stop fantasizing, watching dramas, reading fanfics and get a life.' People may find it stupid, but I think I know a lot more after really immersing myself into the countless stories that I wish would be my fate.

It's surprising, how it's possible to see everything clearly when infatuation isn't in the way. Once you can gather your thoughts straight, you can think properly and realise everything isn't as it seems, isn't as you thought it was.
You will either realise, and fall further, knowing that everything that left you is everything that you need. Or you will rise higher, knowing that everything that left you was for the better, and you can move on to what is more important.

It's not that I refuse to love, but that I haven't found the reason to love. The reason to love, is the person that will love me unconditionally, everything that I want, he'll give. Everything that I need, he'll give. Everything that I do, he'll support. He'll be on my side, unconditionally. Nothing will stop him from staying with me, although there might be times when arguments take over, and everything falls apart. He'll leave, but he will always, always come back.

There are different types of love, some which break easily because you give up, some which are strong because you hold on tight enough and some which go beyond anything in the world. Love isn't just an emotion, the whole process of loving someone must include physical and verbal affection. If you can't get that from someone, then really...it isn't worth it.

It's not that I refuse to love, but that I haven't found the reason to love. When that one person comes into your life, who changes everything then straight away, the first thing you should know is that it won't be easy. You have to be ready for your life to tie up in knots, and once you untie one, another will start to form, you have to be fast to deal with it, so you can finally untie all knots and have a smooth outcome.

Nothing that you want enough, will be easy. But in the end, it'll be worth it. As everyone does, you'll have to face a problem in your life, a problem that stops you from getting where you want, an obstacle to your dreamed of perfect ending. You know you have two choices- hold on, and face everything that will lead you to breaking, or give up, and live your live without that one that you have always wanted.

It's not that I refuse to love, but that I haven't found the reason to love. Once you step foot into this world, your only way out was death. Your only ending is death. Once you took your first breath in this air, your only way to lose the attachment with it was death. Your only ending is death. If the outcome, no matter what happens, would always be the same...why spend your life in misery? why spend your life in guilt? why spend your life in regret?

If you ever find a person who could love you unconditionally, find a person that would change your world, and give you theirs, then you hold on to it. You hold on to it with everything you have. You forget the second choice of giving up, and you hold on. You hold on and face everything that will lead you to breaking, because in the end, there's only death. Why would you fear how you would be if your once in a lifetime love left you after you gave them your all if you would just regret that you never gave them your all in the first place. You forget the fear, forget the guilt, forget the regret. And you live knowing that you deserve to be happy, you don't deserve to feel the negative emotions that reside within you.

It's not that I refuse to love, but that I haven't found the reason to love. Don't listen to anything that tries to scare you, because it's always possible to face it.

“Even a chance at being miserable for the years to come if he leaves you?”
“Wouldn’t you be miserable if you never went back to him?”

Exactly that. Misery and regret will haunt you if you don't take the chance, and take in the one love that changed your life, the one love that loves you unconditionally, the one love that is once in a lifetime. Instead, you go with them, and you do everything in your power to stay with them, to run with them, to love with them because in the end, you'll at least be able to smile, knowing that if they leave you, you had your time with them, and you gave them your all.

Labels: love, thoughts

“I just wanted you to know,” her voice began softly, tears filling her eyes as she held the love of her life close to her, never again letting him go, “…that no matter where life takes me, no matter the distance, no matter the length of time, no matter the obstacles—I'll always come back to you. Even if I, myself, am not sure if I'll come back—in the end I'll always come back. Cause that's the thing about boomerangs, right? They come back even if they feel they shouldn't, they come back even if the world tries to stop them, they come back because they ultimately know where they belong... and who they belong to. "

___________________

She wrapped her arms around him and then brought his head down so that their foreheads were touching, so she could stare into his eyes with pure hope, “My Illusionist, will you take me into a world filled with timeless magic?”

He smiled, grazing his hand over her face, “Are you willing to disappear?”

“Will you disappear with me?”

His smile grew wider as he nodded and then pressed his soft lips against hers, giving her his soul. He no longer cared about anything else.

Both of them no longer cared about what the future had in store for them.

All that mattered to them was the here and now—all that mattered to them was their timeless distraction.



“Let’s disappear, Princess.”

___________________

Chapters 36 and 37 finally read, and only one more update left before this fanfic is completed, now all there is, is the wait. Ha, nearly cried. Tears were blurring my vision whilst i was trying to read chapter 36, this story is just too emotional..it's really having some kind of weird affect on me. I guess i just can't help it..when there's so much in there that you would want to happen for yourself, and so much that you'll be damned if it happened to you. All there is, is the wait. Hopefully, a happily ever after.

Labels: love, thoughts

No, no..omg no. This fic is actually getting to me, i've just read the end of chapter 31 and damn, it's so heartbreaking..just earlier i read this part and thought it was so sweet, in a weird way..but still sweet.

“No, you really did that. You murmured something in your sleep and got up. I thought you were awake and I asked if you were getting better but you didn’t say anything and just came down onto the floor and wrapped your arms around me and then slept on my chest. It was actually kinda scary because you lifted up my shirt and kept smoothing your hands over my abs,” he smiled coyly, “That was when I knew you had a thing for my stomach. You wouldn’t stop molesting it until you fell asleep.”

But just at the end of the chapter, everything's changed...it feels like a relationship that was so perfect just before, everything working out, a dream date going well, it all changes...violence, hatred and killer instincts took over and there's a complete mess. What the hell.

I need to read on..chapter 32 now, then there's chapter 33...then i'll have to wait for updates. It's going to kill me to wait for these updates...in the past few days all i've had on my mind is this fic, and the wish for a fanfic life..

The first part of chapter 32, i've just read it...and it's even more heartbreaking, i actually spilt a few tears...i can't believe it's happening..how a relationship can be broken so quickly, just because of something that couldn't be controlled. Because of someone else a perfect relationship was broken.

Wow..she's back..haha, whoever's reading this probably won't understand what i'm on about..but that someone else is actually back. Completely killing the love story that was once there, now i have one more chapter to read..and i think i'll finish it now before going to sleep..

It's 4.15am, and i have finally finished chapter 33 of welcome to the underworld, and damn. The main guy, never fails to amaze me, the end of that chapter really has left me wanting a heck of a load more. Too bad i'll have to wait.

Happiness, tears, love, anger and shock. All of those emotions went through me at some point whilst reading these few chapters.

Labels: love, thoughts

Have been at my aunties since monday, dyed my hair last night, and left there early today to get out for the cwalk linkup. Got up and got ready etc..also read some more of wttu :D have been reading it constantly, sitting in my cousin's play room/relaxing room whilst he played on the xbox and screamed at all his friends over the headset whilst i had the laptop propped on the arm of the sofa, sitting with my ipod in and cuddling a pillow, practically immersing myself into the fic. I've just read one and a bit chapters, finally on chapter 30 and omg :O it's at such a good part, but i'm tired..so i'll save the rest for another day.

After getting ready, i got all my things, and then my mum drove me to the o2, i rang Kamen when i got there, asking her where she was, then i saw the massive group of asians..haha. She couldn't see me though, i was like 'i can see Cindy, and KY and Jess!' and she still couldn't see me, turns out she was facing the wrong way. idiot. haha.

After watching a bit of cwalking, and pretty much walking around aimlessly for an hour or so, we decided to head for central. I didn't really have money with me though, since i was hoping that we weren't actually going to go central, so i could get the bus home from o2 for free instead...but since we were going to central, i started to ask for someone to pay for my ticket. Tried to ask Yip, but i think he was ignoring me for beating him up earlier ^^'' then i asked Troy, but he said he had no money, so i asked KY, and he pretty much gave it, just like that. Haha<3

So then, me and Joyce went to get our tickets, since the rest had already went, i wasn't really thinking, and was more expecting to get my normal return card and then run out of abbey wood without being caught with the wrong card..but then it turns out that i couldn't get that kind of ticket there, obviously i didn't take in the fact it was underground and not rail.

I started walking around pointlessly since i needed an extra pound to get a travel card...and then a load of people came down. I saw Andrew and then tried to get money off him by grabbing onto his arm and tugging it like 'please~ please ah gor~ please~' hahaha, then he said he'll give me £1 if someone else would pay the other half, by that time, KY misinterpreted the £1 i was holding earlier to be my own, so he took it back..until i begged him for it so i could have Andrew's pound and actually buy a ticket, he gave in though~ so then i bought the ticket and went with everyone else to get on a train.

We got to central, then went to mcdonalds and some people got food, but then me, Joyce and Cindy were just like 'no money.' when people asked us if we were getting anything xD i ended up just stealing KY, Kamen and Yip's chips, and one and a half chicken nuggets off Kamen xD

Went to troc after, just the normal really..walk around, this time i didn't pay much attention to people on pump or mt3 though, mainly was just saying hi to people and stuff..found KC and Kelvin at pump, then i said to KC 'you still haven't added me' and he said that he'll add me tonight, cos he doesn't see the point of this anymore xD

Walked around outside with Cindy for a while, getting fresh air...then when we got back in we saw Jess come out, so then we stayed with her a while then walked around troc together. Mainly just walked around everywhere, then we headed over to traf, saw Nick, then everyone practically went 'OHMYGOD IT'S NICK!' and jumped on him. LOL

Stayed at traf, talked to people..messed around..and then i went home. xD got back home on time, wasn't late at all ^^ simply got home, ate dinner..then read welcome to the underworld for the rest of the time.

Oh, and Andrew. I hate you, why does your hair colour come out better than mine without doing anything different to it -____-...

Labels: friends

Is it wrong, to wish to live in a fiction story? a fanfic, 'Welcome to the Underworld' to be exact.
I find that every time i read a fanfic, i always wish that i was that main girl, with the perfect frame, flawless skin and beautiful looks and personality. The one that everyone likes, and then i fall in love with the hot and sexy, but sweet bad guy. And no matter how bad he seems to everyone else, i know that he's sweet, and that he's sweet only to me.

Having your life as a story would be so perfect, you could write your own ending, everything that leads to it and occurs before it. You could have the sweetest, hottest, sexiest, most charming guy be yours, and yours only. Knowing that although loads of girls would die to be by his side, and try with all their might to be close to him, he would disregard them and look at you only.

You could have that romantic scene with a beautiful view, fresh and relaxing air and soft breeze, the sun kissing your skin..you could have the late night in depth talks, letting everything inside of you out, and taking everything from him in..and you could have the bitter arguments, completely screaming eachothers heads off, and then making up straight after with a simple sign of affection or concern.

The guy will always be there by you, when you're in any form of danger, he puts you closely behind him and blocks anything that could hurt you. He can read your mind. He can tell everything that your thinking, and he knows when something is bothering you, and you know that you can trust him, trust him enough to tell him everything, everything that you weren't meant to say, everything that you've kept to yourself, you can tell him all of it.

You would know he would never leave you, ever. He can't leave you. You tell him something and he loses his mind, he goes crazy and walks out of the door, half way out he stops. He stops when you tell him to stay, he stops when you tell him that you need him. But then he whispers a 'sorry' and walks out, closing the door behind him. You lean against the back of the door and slide to the ground, tears filling your eyes. You can't stand it so you leave too, you find somewhere to go. Then the next day, you find out...that just one minute. Just one minute after you left, he came back for you, because he couldn't leave you. He never left you, he spent all but a few minutes of the time he left you just standing on the other side of the door, not being able to leave, but not being able to come back. In the last few minutes he runs down the stairs trying to distance himself from you, and in that time, you leave. You take the elevator and you leave. And just as you go down, he comes running back up, he comes back up and come back to you. But you're not there. It's just the next day, you find all of this out, and you find out that he spent the whole day searching around the whole city trying to find you.

In every situation where you're outside in the cold, unprepared. He takes off his jacket or hoodie, and covers you with it, and you can smell his cologne and feel his warmth. He says that he's got a lot on his mind, and so do you, so he takes you to a place, a silent place with a beautiful view. He sits there on the grass and tells you to do the same, then when he realises you're cold, he stands up, and repositions himself so he's behind you, you sit in between his parted legs, and he wraps his arms around you, keeping you both warm.

These are really only a few of the things that i can think of, the sweetest parts that i remember from the fic that i'm reading, and i thought...it would be so good, just perfect, if my life was like a fanfic, where even through all the bad troubles that come, the ending will always be good. Although it's a wish that would never come true, it doesn't hurt to just wish, that my life could be like this...

Labels: love, thoughts